We fiercely claim independence… but secretly long to assimilate.
Consciously and unconsciously our speech patterns, manner of dress, and even interests morph over time to come more in line with those with whom we spend time.
Feeling alone, on the outs, or in the midst of a transition is simply uncomfortable to us, and accordingly something we attempt to avoid. We don’t want to be recognized as new or novel, but would strangely prefer to be glossed over. Be seen as one of the ‘old’ faces. Be accepted and included.
These human tendencies were instilled to aid us in connecting and bonding with our peers/society, but they also present a challenge to our individual hegemony. Left unchecked, these macro and micro concessions to the group can fundamentally alter our being.
“Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.”
We are encouraged by Paul to avoid becoming wholly one with our surroundings. To not lose ourselves to the whims of the moment, instead to cling steadfast to something immovable and timeless. Something that will lift us up, vice return us to the lowest common denominator.
And life certainly is art. For to avoid assimilation altogether is to ostracize yourself from the group and lose out the benefits that come with community (love, support, and momentum), while complete assimilation comes with its own foibles. We are therefore charged to find and maintain balance between the collective and the personal.
“It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after your own; the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.”
Perhaps it is time to audit our influences and better understand the direction they are leading us. To refocus on living amidst vice wholly losing ourselves to the current wave. For alone, neither the hermit nor the crowd present the full richness of life. Furthermore, affecting true change requires a foot in both worlds.